As my twenties begin to wrap up, I’m starting to ask myself: what things in my life truly bring me joy?

Do I really like my job or do I just like the cute penguin pics?

Do I actually enjoy all my hobbies or do I just think they look cool?

Is green even my favorite color or did I just have to pick one different from my sister's as a kid?

These are questions for a Trained Professional™, not a birthday party :)

Instead, in the vein of getting to know myself better this year, there are some MUCH easier questions I want to ask:

Is Tillamook ice cream really tastier than Haagen-Dazs or does it just feel fancier?

Can I actually tell the difference between QFC's bear-bottle honey and my much-more-expensive local farmer's market honey?

Is Tito's really the best vodka or do I just have decades-long brand loyalty?

So I’ve enrolled in

✨FLIGHT SCHOOL✨

and oops I enrolled you with me

All of the tests in Flight School are enjoyable little flights where you get to vote for the best and worst versions of each item

As you vote, each item’s score will be live-tallied and we’ll figure out the best and worst variant (per democracy)

We'll also compare individual votes to the Democratic Scores to find the person with the most basic tastes, the biggest contrarian, and the person with tastes most similar to me

(see: it’s my birthday!)

So get ready to learn a lot about your palate, because a boarding pass has been issued in your name

+you may bring one carry-on item of less than 77 inches (taller +1s will be allowed on a case-by-case basis)

As per FAA regulations, if you arrive for boarding after 7:30PM we cannot guarantee we can rebook all of your flights

(some foods are temperature-sensitive)

And due to national familial leave policies, the core curriculum will last less than 2 hours so that enrollees may return home to their pets ❤

No Patches, Alki, Leia, or Felix will be left home alone all night on my watch